A Blast from the Past

This Sunday during church Mike talked about not waiting for the world to change....and during his sermon he told the story behind a watch that he wears. He received the watch from a family that were members at a church he was the minister at in Texas. The family had the watch engraved and gave it to him after the funeral of the family's mother, who had passed away from cancer. The engraving was Jeremiah 29:11. As Mike said the verse my Adult ADD kicked in and I started to look up the verse, instead of listening to Mike, who was actually reading the verse. As I turned in my bible to the verse I saw that I had already underlined it...sometimes I see that I have underlined verses in my bible but do not remember doing so, but as soon as I read it I remembered when and where I had underlined this verse.
Back in the last part of Feb 2003 (was 23) I was in St. Louis at a Christ in Youth conference for Jr. Highers called "Believe." I was on the trip as a sponsor. I was there to be there for the kids but that weekend my mind was occupied with a battle that was going on in my mind and with a decision that I had made the previous week. Cindy and Jan were on the trip too, and I talked with them about wheter I had made the right decision or not, but Marla, the children's minister, was not aware. I am not sure how the conversation started, but prior to Friday nights worship I was trying find peace about my decision while reading through my Bible, when Marla, who is sitting next to me, leans over and asks me, "What battle are you fighting up there?"..referring to my mind. I was taken aback. I filled her in on the situation...and then worship started. During the message Marla puts her Bible on my lap and points to Jeremiah 29:11, which reads, "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." I can not tell you what the speaker spoke about b/c I spent the service staring at that verse and tying other verses together (which I cannot remember where they are or find them at the moment). Here is what God revealed to me that night through scripture and through conversation....When you are truly seeking God in your life He will give you the desires of your heart, but as you seek him your desires and dreams in life transform into God's desires and dreams for you. Although the verse did not answer my question it provided the peace I was searching for.
My struggle began 3 weeks earlier when I found out that I had been accepted into both PT programs at Belmont University and New York University. I had until the Monday after the Believe conference to let NYU know if I was coming to there program or not.
My struggle was: Do I let go of my dream (my desire!).. .that God had blessed me with (b/c we all know He is the reason I even was accepted), OR accept the alternate route that God had also paved for me {by having Jon and Becca move to Dyersburg after grad from Belmont PT...working with Hope, my friend and youth minister's wife (Her own person though) and creating the opportunity for the conversation with them that led me to PT.}
I had chosen Belmont earlier in the week...I think to please my parents and b/c it seemed the safe choice, but that verse gave me the courage to..Stop..and seriously reconsider the decision I had made.
I remember on Monday morning I was in the computer room and found myself writing Belmont on one piece of paper and NYU on another. After 10 throws the outcome was......NYU-10 and Belmont-0.
I was also doing a lot of praying and listening.
I finally emailed NYU and told them I was not coming..that I was going to Belmont.
I wish I could say that God stood before me and said, "Anna, go to Belmont." He did not..I know you are surprised, but He did lay Belmont on my heart that morning.
Even after accepting Belmont I did not mentally accept it...I might have been a little bitter and not really excited about it, but over all I knew that even though He had given me my desire I needed to trust in his plan for me in Nashville, even if I didn't know what it was. I am not saying if I had gone to NYU I would have been going against God's plans for me, or never have achieved them...... I just feel that sometimes God's gives us our desires and also gives us a better option. Each are fine and He will use us no matter what.
So like the verse says, I didn't know the plans He had for me But I had to trust He HAD plans for me.

I don't know if that all made sense..

So, that whole struggle was what flooded back into my mind during church yesterday..just thought I would share how God provided me with a peace about the unknown and sometimes unwanted paths in life.

A lot happened over my 3 yrs at Belmont..a lot of people I might never have met and possibly a lot of places I might never have gone.

I love how God's word can grow with us..that it transends time...
I am again touched by this verse as I am trying to decide where to work. I know that anywhere I go I will benefit from the things that I will learn there. I just have to remember to seek God in this search, go forward with the knowlage of Jeremiah 29:11, and then trust He will place before me the desires of my heart.